Tuesday, April 30, 2013


$20,000. Each. Yes, twenty thousand dollars, that's what six former congresspeople and an ex-senator (Mike Gravel, you know, the rock guyare getting paid to sit in a room and listen to witnesses explain that not only are aliens real and frequent visitors to our planet but that the government knows all about them and is hiding the truth
Pictured: A weather balloon reflecting light from
the planet Venus. Also swamp gas. (courtesy: USAF)
-Me, asking for 20 grand
You know, I've long insisted that there is life on other planets, and like this committee I am also not in Congress so what I want to know is where's my twenty grand? The answer is, of course, no one gives a shit that I think there are aliens. However, plenty of shits were given to "...as many as forty researchers and military/agency witnesses" who are right now testifying before the former members of Congress at the Citizen Hearing on Disclosure or CHD (acronym=legit).

Photo of the Capital Dome, off-center
quote in times new roman, no site this
classy could possibly be bullshit... 
I know what your thinking, how were these former congresspeople able to take time away from not being in congress in order to hear testimony? Well, I'm sure $20,000 each had a hand in it, but as it happens, this is an "event with historical implications", the website even says so, and why would they lie? Check it out, it's a surprisingly classy site, not the standard gif-addled GeoCites eye-sores one would usually associate with people trying to prove that the government is hiding aliens from us. There's even a trailer which...wait...do historical events usually have trailers? 
Thif fummer, King George if about to meet a royal pain in the <explosion!>
The Revolutionary War: Coming foon to a colony near you!
Oh that? They're just agreeing
to disagree...about everything...ever.
Does this smell a little Zeitgeist-y to anyone else? I mean, wouldn't the kind of conspiracy the CHD is trying to sniff out would require hundreds or maybe even thousands of people from different branches of our government and military all working together in lockstep unity despite political and philosophical differences over decades? Like, we can't get everyone to agree on anything...at all, not guns, not healthcare, hell, a third of us would like us to elect Jesus the king of 'merica. Yet somehow the shadowy figures behind this conspiracy have been pulling this off since Rosewell?

If somehow the Citizen's Hearing on Disclosure cracks open the largest conspiracy of our times using slick web design and Facebook likes, awesome, more power to them. But is it weird that I have more confidence in the idea that aliens exist and just find us too uninteresting and/or primitive to bother with than I do in the Government's ability to cover them up?
Earth: It's the galaxy's Delaware. Have you
ever had the urge to visit Delaware? Exactly. 

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