Saturday, December 5, 2015

No really, Ted Nugent's on their board.

Ok, so I know this week has been kind of an unremitting horrorshow of gun violence, political divisiveness and macabre media lookie-loo-ism, but we're like just a couple weeks out from episode VII, so bear with me, we'll talk about nerdy stuff soon. What I wanted to let you know is that apparently all this awfulness is the President's fault.
Thanks Obam-wait, you know what?, no.
No thanks Obama. No thanks at all.
If the bullets don't get you, the E. coli will.
 (source: jokes from like a month ago)
Oh yeah. You probably thought that the fact that we live in constant fear of being murdered by well-armed terrorists, gunned down in a Chipotle or just caught in the crossfire during one of our many gang wars was the result of ineffective and loophole-ridden gun control laws combined with a culture that love violence and glorifies weapons but no, according to NRA president Wayne LaPierre, it's because President Obama and those Washington elites love crime. They love it. God I hate those Washington elites...oh and the media. It's their fault too. Everyone but the gun lobby.

Good luck keeping it down.
Now you're probably wondering how a guy who routinely blames gun violence on an insufficient number of armed vigilantes could possibly make the case that everyone else in the country is at fault. The answer of course is shut up. Wayne LaPierre knows what he's talking about, he is, after all, he's the head of the NRA, so why would he lie about something like this? To prove his point, he's made a series of informative videos so you can grab some popcorn and binge-watch the moral decay of America.

Smith & Wesson: makers of a wide
array of semi-auto 'sporting' rifles...
you know, for sports or whatever.
Tips and Tactics sponsored by Cabbalas®, Patriot Profiles sponsored by Smith & Wesson®, even Armed and Fabulous, a series about women who love guns. It's like Netflix if Netflix consisted only of right-wing rants sponsored by gun manufacturers. The message is clear: no one has done more to curb gun-violence in America than an organization who routinely sees every mass shooting as an opportunity to suggest that it never would have happened if the victims were better armed. This message of unwavering support for guns brought to you by Smith & Wesson®.

Spoiler alert: LaPierre thinks
 the answer is more fucking guns.
Anyway, in his videos LaPierre makes the case that the NRA has been pushing for stronger gun control for years:

"The NRA has demanded the strongest possible prosecution of the federal gun laws for over 20 years. Our repeated calls have been met by deafening silence from Washington's elites."

-Wayne LaPierre on the NRA's push for-
hang on, are we talking about the same NRA?

Like seriously, is the argument here that politicians are pro-murder and that the NRA is some kind of lone voice of reason? Look, I know that laying blame is neither productive nor fair. Our relationship with guns is complicated and no one wants more violence, but holy shit. I mean, if the NRA would like to be taken seriously on this and any other issue, maybe they should stop blaming everyone else for not doing enough to restrict the industry they lobby so hard for. Oh, and maybe think about kicking Ted Nugent off the board.
Pictured: NRA Board Member and noted gun-toting lunatic
Ted Nugent, seen here not making them look any more rational.

No comments:

Post a Comment