Saturday, December 26, 2015

Because Florida

Could we, I don't know, please stop shooting one another? Some jackass just opened fire in a McDonalds in Florida, our most embarrassing state.
I'm pretty sure Spain would buy it back, I mean, has
anybody asked them recently if they'd be interested?
McNuggets. Worth dying for? No.
Worth killing for? Apparently.
It was 12:30 in the afternoon in a McDonald's in Miami-Dade and two dudes got into an argument about-no, you know what? It can't possibly matter. There is nothing, literally nothing that could possibly happen between two strangers waiting for their goddamn McNuggets that could in any way warrant drawing a weapon and threatening murder. But hey, here we are. One of the men pulled out a gun saying "I'll kill you right now." And then do you know what happened? He shot him. Like right then. Shot him in the arm. 

I'm all for the 3rd Amendment though.
Those assholes can find a Holiday Inn. 
The assailant was arrested and the victim was ok, well as ok as you can be after getting shot in the arm in McDonald's, but what the hell? Look, I know we don't yet know all the facts about this incident, and I get that it's kind of a dick move to take something that happened only hours ago and use it to criticize millions of law abiding gun-owners, but the NRA is full of shit and the Second Amendment was referring to muskets. It doesn't give anyone the right to walk around with a Ruger in their pants just in case someone pisses them off at Mickey D's.

I'm not saying that we should take all the guns away, but maybe we should take all the guns away, you know? Or at least most of the guns. Like the really big ones. And the really small, easily concealed ones. If you want a gun it should be a muzzle-loader. That's what James Madison was taking about.
"Look, I didn't exactly see automatic weapons and armor piercing
bullets coming. You know, when I wrote the damn thing flush toilets
were cutting edge technology and you could legally own people."
-James Madison

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