|Lucky for me the bus driver stopped to take a leak at the Safeway.|
|If you said praying, you have |
absolutely no sense of humor.
|The end is near alright, |
just not in the way he thinks...
|Tonya Harding, Forrest Gump, the Rapture...man, 1994 was quite a year.|
|Yeah, that's going to hurt|
the Bluebook value...
|"And I would have gotten away with it, |
if it wasn't for that meddling geriatric!"
Also, I'm no theologian, but isn't this whole thing a little presumptuous? Let's say you're a supremely powerful deity who created the universe and is (for some reason) planning to destroy it on May 21st 2011. Now you want this to be a secret, and you're god, so it shouldn't be a problem, right? I mean, Shyamalan could do it. Then how come some jackass with a radio show is passing out t-shirts giving away the biggest spoiler of all time?
|Why not, right?|
And then there's this whole double standard when it comes to the unprovable. If I predict that aliens will one day park their motherships in orbit and invite the human race to join an intergalactic U.N. I'm a crackpot. But if I take out ads warning people that Jesus is going to beam Mike Huckabee and a select few dinosaur deniers off the surface of the Earth before going on some kind of apocalyptic judgement spree, I'm one of the faithful. What's with that?
Beacon of sanity, in an
But I guess the most chilling part of Camping's prediction is not that people might actually believe him, it's that tiny little voice in your head that against all reason is wondering: 'what if he's on to something?' Admit it, it's crossed your mind. After all, if you accept that there's no such thing as impossible, just extreme degrees of improbability, you have to at least entertain the notion that anything, even this, is possible. Well, I'll tell you the one thing that's helped me beat back this terrifying thought: No matter how random, how cruel the universe may seem at times, it can't possibly be so fundamentally broken as to end like a direct-to-video Kirk Cameron movie. It just can't.
p.s. Be sure to check out this website for some major backpedaling (and probably some free t-shirts) on May 22nd!
|Really? I'm being unfair?|
*I have no real evidence that Harold Camping came up with his predictions while drinking gin, the truth is I'm just making crap up. Of course, so's Harold Camping. I guess we're even.