Saturday, March 5, 2011

Don't worry, I don't really have a cat...

...or maybe to not be a fly...
Hope you brought a tarp, 'cause I'm about to get nerd all over the place. According to this article from, Robert Orci (who co-wrote the 2009 Star Trek movie) and producer Damon Lindelof locked themselves in a hotel room last week to write the Star Trek sequel and presumably enjoy those tiny coffee makers and complimentary wifi. Oh, to be a fly. And get this: they're looking for fan-input.

At this point they might as well call it
whatever they want. I'd go with: 'Deflecto-Ray' 
Now, don't eject your core just yet, they're only asking fans what to call that blue glowey thing on the front of starships. They're torn between 'main deflector dish' and 'main deflector array.' Why they don't look it up online, I don't know. Fully 18 percent of the entire internet is information about Star Trek, but if they want to know what the fans think, that's cool. Although in the last movie J. J. Abrams moved an entire planet just for the hell of it, so is accuracy really that high on their list?

I totally never got why the director did this. What made him think that Star Trek geeks-who are notorious for jumping on even the most minor inconsistencies-would think this is neat? He said he felt it would make a good Easter Egg for the fans. But as a fan, I was more confused by how the writers didn't know that planet Delta Vega was nowhere near Vulcan. Also, why would the Vulcans name one of the planets in their star system after a frat? Of course a better question might be why would they name their planet after a Roman god from Earth? Am I over-thinking this?
Zephram Cochrane: "Welcome to Earth, what planet are you from?"
Commander Solkar: "You know, we never bothered to come up with a name for it. 
Any suggestions? We're wide open."

This. This is the opposite of cool.

Is it nit-picky of me to complain about a thing like where a stupid made-up planet is? Maybe (definitely), but that's why we're called 'fans' (as in fanatic) and not say 'milds' (as in mildly enthusiastic about). We Star Trek fans have a long and rich history of obsessing over the details of a fictitious universe. It's what makes us so cool (or, you know, whatever the opposite of cool is).

That said, I didn't hate the new Star Trek, I just think it could have benefited from a Trekkie's touch. There were some, shall we say 'inconsistencies' with the established Trekiverse that could be avoided in the next film. If they really want some fan input, give me or any one of my rubber-pointy-ear-wearing brothers and sisters a call. It's not like we're doing anything else (what? I kid). We would totally be a valuable resource, like bauxite (we drop knowledge on this blog). Not only are we well-versed in Star Trek lore and minutia, but we're also opinionated. It's a winning combination, just ask my cat/best friend/science officer Lieutenant Commander Purrcy. I'll be waiting by the phone.
Although even I don't know what that hell that red thing on Tasha Yar's face was.
Blood? Some sort of space-rash? Anyone?

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