Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Glenn Shadix for Dick Cheney, any takers?

Today I read about the passing of Glenn Shadix (whose name is totally something out of Star Wars). He is probably best known for playing the bitchy interior designer in Beetlejuice:

and the kimono clad majordomo from Demolition Man (yes, I love that movie. It's awesome and I don't care who knows it).

The passing of such a delightful character actor in a world so full of living douche bags reminds us all how fleeting life is and how we should make each moment count. Also, wouldn't it be nice if we could swap the worst of the worst for people like Glenn Shadix? I mean, why does Gilda Radner die at 42, while Strom Thurmond gets to live to 100? Look, I don't really wish death on anyone (at least, not that I'd admit to), it's just that I wonder sometimes what the world would be like if life were a little more fair. It doesn't seem right that some people who have added to the world with art, music or muppets should be dead while others who do nothing but spread fear, hatred and host Fox news shows get to live to ripe old ages. To that end, I have invented a game. It works like this, you take a living person who sucks and trade them for a dead person who died before their time. Simple, no? 

Par example:

Glenn Beck for Madeline Khan. One of these people spent her short time on this planet bringing light and joy into the lives of others. The other is Glenn Beck.

Donald Rumsfeld for Jim Henson. Say these two were drowning and you could save only one of them. Seriously, which one would you save? 

Rush Limbaugh for Chris Farley. Pound for pound, I think you'll agree that this exchange is more than fair.

It's a fun game, and you can play it at home. One rule though: never use people you know. Nothing kills a party like: "I wish mom was still alive."


  1. how bout bill o'riley for tom brokaw? er huey long for arnold shwarzenegger? that might be harsh.....dr.laura for dr. ruth for sho any damn day!!!

  2. I would like to offer up the following suggestions, Shawn Hannity for Marvin Gaye, (because lets be honest, that's a no brainer), or for my nerdier choice, any (or all, I really don't care) of the Bush's for Bob Kane.