The Dorn Identity

Above: Worf's mighty Klingon brow
once disguised this be-polo'd nerd.

Check this out: Michael Dorn, the actor who spent like 15 years in Worf makeup was approached about an appearance in Star Trek 2 (or 12, or my favorite: Star 2rek: The Ensequeling). Of course Dorn would most likely have been playing Worf's great great whatever ancestor or something since the movie is set in the past of the alternate-whatever universe but still: Worf! Unfortunately as quickly as he was approached, he was unapproached and Trek 2 will be Worf-less. So what happened?

William Shatner, best known as the
Priceline Negotiator actually originated
the role of Captain Kirk. Who knew?

I suppose director J.J. Abrams is unwilling to open the door for future cameos. If he lets Worf show up in this movie what's to stop a William Shatner hologram or a time-traveling Wesley Crusher from popping up in Trek 3? Nothing that's what. Mass hysteria. For whatever reason the only original Trek actor allowed to appear in the re-booted Trekiverse is Leonard 'Mr. Spock' Nimoy. Sure, he's retired, but he seems more than willing to put on the ears if you give him enough money. In fact, if rumors are to be believed, he might even been Spocking it up in the sequel. That's cool, I mean, who wouldn't want more Spock?*

Ok, I'm a little ashamed.

Anyway, back to Michael Dorn and other Worf-related spin-off projects. Is anyone else totally up for The Adventures of Captain Worf: Space Ranger? Because I am and I'm not ashamed to admit it. At the Phoenix Comicon Michael Dorn revealed that he's been developing a direct-to-DVD movie about Worf flying around in his own ship doing Worf shit. Will it ever happen? Probably not, as the studio is understandably not so eager to dilute the franchise so soon after saving it from irrelevance. It makes sense, but still, it's kind of a bummer.

Sure, Lore was evil, but at least he
could carry on a conversation.

J. J. Abrams' alt-re-boot Trek movie was great and all, but is was kind of aimed at casual fans or people who'd avoided Trek altogether in favor of sports and mating. What about those of us who grew up on TNG and DS9? It's been like 10 years since the corebreach that was Star Trek: Nemesis, and I for one would like to see what's up with Jean-Luc and Beverly. And did Geordi ever hook up with that hologram? And what about Data's other brother, B-4? Is he still, you know, an idiot? Where's our shameless fan service?

Sure, I guess there's always the internet (Paramount is surprisingly cool about fans with green screens and ill-fitting uniforms making their own Star Trek shows), but it would be nice to see some TNG Star Trek that wasn't produced in some guy's laundry room.

If your babysitter can team up with your 7th grade math teacher
to make their own Star Trek show, why can't Michael Dorn have a go at it?

*But still...

Above: A goddamned time portal.

As much as I love classic Spock, I maintain that including Leonard Nimoy in the 2009 movie or its sequel is a bit of a plot hole and a clean re-boot would have been a better idea. You see Spock Prime comes from the future (of the future, still with me?) and in his long life has made use of like 15 different methods of time travel (one of which he invented himself) which he could very easily use to save his mother, the planet Vulcan and restore the timeline to its original pre-Eric Bana condition. It's what you're supposed do when someone screws with history, and don't give me any of that 'alternate-reality' crap either, I know of which I speak.