Tripping on L

Yeah, they frown on a lot of things.

Remember a ways back when a Catholic Priest denied communion to a woman at her own mother's funeral? Well, it happened. I should explain for those not as well-versed in the subject of theology as I am that communion is a Catholic sacrament (important holy-thing) by which Catholics commune with the almighty. Basically it's a big damn deal. So what's the Father Marcel Guarnizo's problem? Why couldn't Barbara Johnson receive communion with everybody else? Well, it turns out the Catholic Church frowns on lesbians. Who knew right?

During the ceremony, Catholics receive communion wafers. These wafers are a
power-up they use to protect themselves against the Holy Ghosts that chase them
around mazes. What? Are you going to waste valuable seconds googling this or
are you just going to trust me on this one? ...Well? Yeah. Thought so.

This dude just needs to get laid.

Anyway, in a surprisingly hip move the Catholic Church actually apologized for the priest's actions and then suspended him-for which he should be grateful given the Church's penchant for thumb-screws and inquisitions. Here's his explanation as to why he couldn't give Leviticus a rest for two minutes and just be a mensch: 

"If a Quaker, a Lutheran or a Buddhist, desiring communion had introduced himself as such...a priest would be obliged to withhold communion. If someone had shown up in my sacristy drunk, or high on drugs, no communion would have been possible either."

-Father Marcel Guarnizo

Yeah, he just compared being gay (or Quaker, Lutheran or Buddhist for that matter) to being drunk or addicted to drugs because nothing says 'God is love' more than 'get out of my sight you hell-bound sodomites, I don't care if it is your mother's funeral.'

In fairness, Lesbians are drug addicts.
Their drug of choice: Ladies.

Lighten up, why is everything
an abomination with you guys?

The worst part is he's probably right, at least technically. It probably is against the rules, but that just means the rules suck. Whether they like it or not some people are gay, some people will get divorced and condoms really are a good idea. Maybe it's time to loosen the collar a little? Like for real, Father Guarnizo's profession is in serious danger of going the way of Betamax, is this really the time to turn people away because some 3000 year-old homophobe wasn't down with shellfish and gay people?

Sorry Betamax fans, I realize it was the superior format,
but let's face it: it's not coming back.