|"Tell me more of this thing you |
Earthmen call 'make out'..."
|The space program has|
long been associated with Tang.
|Holy shit, STOP HAVING KIDS!|
Do we need more motivation? How 'bout this: we're about to hit the 7 billion population mark (note the 'B'), and barring some sort of zombie apocalypse, planet Earth is only going to get more crowded, especially if we keep giving people TV shows just for breeding (thanks TLC). I'm not saying people shouldn't have kids, well, some people probably shouldn't... I'm just suggesting that people shouldn't have a ridiculous number of kids.
|Sure it's people,|
but have you tried the cool ranch?
Sure, they're cute now, but in 20 years when people are getting knifed at 7 Eleven over the last Hotpocket in North America, we'll know who's to blame. They're like the jerks that bring uninvited friends to a party: they eat all the Chex Mix, they drink all the beer, and then someone burns a hole in the sofa. I mean the planet's food and water can only be stretched so far. Have we learned nothing from Soylent Green?
So what's to be done? Well, I see two options: We could either convince everyone to practice restraint and have a reasonable number of children so as not to overtax the limited resources of our world or we could brake the light barrier and colonize the galaxy. Which do you think people are more likely to go for?
|Suck our plasma Malthus!|