|In Japan, they do science.|
The plan (partially according to the article, I had to fill in some blanks myself) goes something like this:
|Horton Hatches an Abomination|
Wrap a modern elephant's egg cell around some mammoth DNA, cover it in chocolate (I assume) and shove the whole genetic Cadbury into some unsuspecting pachyderm. Wait 10 months and presto: Woolly Mammoth. Some people might deride this as playing god, I am going to laud this as playing god. If you're going to spit in the face of mother nature, you might as well make it a loogie.
|Behold: our bleak future.|
Obviously the first thing the research team is going to do after bringing an extinct species back from oblivion is hold a press conference. They'll discuss their findings, answer questions and laugh at the fools who said it couldn't be done. This is also where they'll likely list their demands. After all, they will soon command an army of mammoth clones, who are we to stand in their way? Nobody, that's who.
|Why not just build this and cut out|
the middle steps?
Step 3: Kill It
Of course before the mass cloning and crushing can begin, the mammoth will undoubtedly get loose and run amok forcing us to destroy it and once again prove that, in the end, the real monster is man. Since this is Japan we're talking about, we can expect the final battle to involve some sort of robotic mammoth created in secret and piloted by some dude in color-coordinated spandex and a bike helmet.
|Suck it, Darwin.|
|Behold: our bright future.|
I mean, that's probably where this is going, some sort of Jurassic Park for douche bags. What's worse is that after a while, the novelty of shooting run of the mill mastodons, saber-tooths and giant sloths will wear off and scientists will have to come up with hybrid creatures to hunt, like Sharktopus.
But that's years down the road. For now let's just enjoy the fact that the mighty woolly mammoth might once again roam, well probably a lab and then maybe a zoo or something.
|"Soon, my icy throwback, soon..."|