Saturday, April 28, 2018

This one time, when Ronny was super drunk...

So this, but with shit. Three rings
of ceaseless, cringe-worthy shit.
Look, I don't want to be one of those annoying people who rather than articulating the problem they're having with something, just raises one eyebrow and repeats the word 'really' again and again with an increasingly incredulous tone, but really? Really? Really? What am I really-ing against? The President's comment that-huh? Yeah, him again. I'm sorry, believe me, I'm as sick of hearing about him as you are but until this is over, what can we do? Not talk about the perpetual shitcirus that is American politics?

Anyway, the President tweeted the following:
Because really?
And then continued which is weird because I thought the whole reason twitter has a character limit is to keep people from rambling on.
No reason? Isn't being even tangentially associated with
the President kind of reputation-poisoning to begin with?
And Ronny stories usually end with the
hotel charging massive cleaning fees.
This after Tester authorized a document accusing former Trump nominee for Secretary of the VA Ronny Jackson of a number of, what's the phrase? Behavioral lapses? No, that's not fair, let's go with acts of drunken douchebaggary. Apparently stories about Ronny always start with him being drunk. Like, super drunk. One of these incidents involved the Secret Service being asked to intervene when Jackson was drunkenly banging on the door of a female college's room while on an overseas trip. The Secret Service says they have no evidence that this happened.

That's not exactly the same thing as a denying that it ever happened only that the Secret Service wasn't involved. It just means that they weren't called in to stop a drunken adult doctor who's also an admiral in the Navy from pounding on a coworker's door in the middle of the night. But ok, fine, this particular allegation doesn't come with any paper trail or physical evidence. Great, but it's not like it's the only one.
"Hey, c'mon, is it really fair to hold me accountable
for things I say and do while shitfaced?

-Jackson, defending himself
I swear, it's not about ragging on the
man's weight, it's about Jackson's
assumption that's we're all idiots.
The document cites what Tester called 'a pattern of behavior' that makes Jackson unfit to serve as the head of the VA. Excessive drinking, handing out Ambien like goddamn Altoids, harassing female staff, and did I mention that this is a grown-ass man who still calls himself Ronny? Or that this is a doctor who has repeatedly insisted that the spray-tan saturated carcass of an overweight septuagenarian who subsists entirely on KFC and bed burgers is somehow the fittest President we've ever had despite all evidence to the contrary?

"How dare you impugn this fine
man by pointing out all the terrible
things he's done? For shame, sir."
Anyway, Jackson withdrew his name after the allegations came out which is not something most people would do when they're being slandered, but ok, I don't care about that. What I do care about is that Donald Trump is suggesting that Senator Tester has sullied an otherwise sterling reputation and that because of this he should resign, which brings me back to the really? Really? The allegations made by Tester against Jackson are false so Tester should resign? Donald 'Most Attended Inauguration Ever' Trump is saying someone else should resign for making wild claims? I...can he not hear himself?

I mean holy shit didn't he spend over a decade telling us that Barack Obama was a Kenyan-born Muslim manchurian candidate? And everyday since election day insisting that he'd have won the popular vote if it weren't for millions of illegal and apparently invisible voters? Allegations which are not only preposterous and demonstrably false but for which he's not presented the slightest hint of a whiff of evidence. Ever. But sure, Tester should resign. Cool.
"Ooh...yes, everyone act shocked, a raging narcissist who’s
gone his entire life without once facing consequences for his
actions is incapable of self-evaluation. Let's all look surprised..."
-The President, kind of
making a valid point

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