Wednesday, November 2, 2016

Today in hot steaming cups of vitriol...

Hey, Halloween's over, so you know what time of the year it is? It's time to start tearing each other's throats out in response to imagined slights against our worldview! And here to help, as always, is Starbucks.
You're right to be angry. These cup designs are just Starbucks'
way of saying that they hate you and everything you stand for.
"Boooo! Harmony...booo!"
Yeah, remember last year when some evangelicals were all upset that the coffee chain wasn't doing enough to raise awareness of Jesus with their official holiday coffee cup design? Well that, again. Only this year we're throwing some pent-up political angst in for good measure. The new cup, designed by artist Shogo Ota, features people of different ages and races all drawn with a single continuous line representing community and inclusiveness so obviously has become a target of anger and vitriol.

The magic of social media is how it
brings us together in our common hatred.
The cup, contrary to what people thought at first, isn't the official holiday cup, but that didn't stop the angry tweets. Lookit this one:

"Now that beloved diversity has blown up in our faces, the libs @Starbucks have begun shilling for unity. lol,,, how typical"

-@BordongaPhillip, noted jerk

"Curse those do-gooders and their
wretched desire to get along!"
Like...seriously? Is he Skeletor? What his beef with positive messages about community and coming together in common love of overly sweet, somewhat burnt-tasting coffee? Look, I don't care about Starbucks, I really don't, but diversity isn't some liberal ploy designed to upset people like @BordongaPhillip, it's a fact of living in America. People are diverse and all Ota was trying to do with the stupid cup is remind people that in all the ways that matter, we're all the same; drawn with the same line, if you will and that maybe we should focus a little more on what binds us rather than what divides us.

Also, hot rock? I don't want to tell
her how to vent her irrational anger, but
I think this was as missed opportunity. 
And this other jerk:

"@Starbucks Screw you. My coffee should NOT (and does NOT) come with political brainwashing. I dropped @Starbucks like a hot rock."

-@RadioAnna, another jerk

I'm not sure saying how neat it would be if everyone got along is really the same thing as political brainwashing. 

And again, please don't think that this is some sort of defense of a massive, international coffee chain so cruel and unfeeling as to offer pumpkin spice and then yank it away just as we're getting used to it. My beef is with the ridiculous anger over what should be a universal message of unity and not being dicks to each other. I mean, what kind of person speaks out against everyone getting along? 
I mean other than the guy running on a platform of disunity,
anger and blind hatred. Other than him, who does that?

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