Inglorious Plumbers

Joe Wurzelbacher, whom you might remember as Joe the Plumber, is a conservative political activist, contractor and now a congressional candidate for Ohio. But did you know that he's also an expert on twentieth century history?

Vote Joe the Plumber! As your Congressman for the Ohio 9th district,
he'll travel back in time, kill Hitler and prevent World War II from ever happening. 

The solution to all of our problems
is obviously more fucking guns.

Oh yes, in a new campaign spot, Joe, while practicing his aim on some (presumably socialist) fruit and vegetables, sets the record straight on the underpinnings of both the Armenian genocide and the Holocaust. It turns out that the real cause wasn't ethnic strife in Turkey or anti-semitism and political scapegoating in Germany but gun control. Yes, if the 11 million victims only had more guns they could have defended themselves against the powerful Nazi war machine that took six years, millions of lives and the combined military resources of the rest of the world to defeat.

Of course it would have been nice if the Nazis didn't have guns either, but what do I know? I'm not a historian...or a plumber...but hey, there you have it: gun control leads directly to genocide. Think of that next time you suggest that maybe some reasonable restrictions on assault rifles are a good idea.

Reagan Administration Press Secretary James Brady:
 Victim of gun-violence, noted gun control advocate and according to Joe the Plumber,
a Charlie Chaplin moustache away from being exactly like Adolf Hitler.