Wednesday, January 10, 2024

Movie or get off the pot.

"A new Star Wars movie? The world must
know my thoughts! Quickly, to the internet!"
-me, evidently
Did you see that there's going to be another Star Wars movie? Yes, another other one. Wait, come back, don't worry, I'm not going to express an opinion about it. Anyway, I guess this one is based on the Mandalorian. You know, that western-themed Star Wars series that got better the further it got from the western-theme? And that's objective fact, not an opinion. So to be clear, I'm not complaining about the announcement of another Star Wars movie. I like Star Wars, and I like more of things I like, and if Disney wants to pump out another one, that's great, I'm in. 

Again, not complaining, but eleven
is a lot. Maybe wait until plans are
a bit firmer before making the logo?
But I am having a little bit of a hard time believing the announcement of another Star Wars. I mean, I believe the announcement exists, I just think there's a decent chance that the film, which is impossibly titled The Mandalorian and Grogu, will not actually make it to movie screens. Or, failing that, Disney Plus. I say this because there have been a lot of Star Wars movies and TV shows announced over the past few years. Like, a lot, a lot. Like, eleven.

But what if he re-cut Rebel Moon in black
and white and changed the aspect ratio?
There was the Patty Jenkin's Rogue Squadron movie, the Zach Snyder thing that turned into Rebel Moon and was, by all accounts terrible, then there was supposed to be an entire trilogy directed by Rian Johnson but then toxic fans got all butt hurt that he made Luke sad in The Last Jedi, and because Disney likes money, they caved and gave The Rise of Skywalker to J.J. Abrams who tried to retcon all the cool stuff Johnson did and--sorry, I'll stop, you don't need me re-nerdsplaining why The Rise of Skywalker was the worst.

My point is that at this point there've been half a dozen Star Wars movies announced since Episode IX, and exactly zero have made it past the announcement phase. Zero. Which is fine. Make ten more, make no more. Either way, I need a commitment here.  I can't take this emotional rollercoaster. 
This, but with emotions instead of nausea.

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