Monday, November 14, 2011

Frank Miller hates your iPhone

I like Batman. I like Scooby-Doo. That
doesn't mean they should hang out.
Wow, did you see this? Frank Miller isn't quite the bastion of rational thought we all think he is. If you don't know who he is, he wrote the graphic novel 300 (which the movie was based on) and is the guy famous for taking the aging, campy and downright Scooby-Doo filled Batman of the 1970's and turning him into the badass we all know and love. Last week on his blog he went off on the Occupy Wall Street movement, and in the process also made a hilarious poop joke. Read carefully, or you might miss the rapier-like subtlety.

Miller, seen here reclining on a pile of
 corpses, is better at 9/11 than we are.
In the rant, he compares the demonstrators to babies, clowns, thieves and rapists who need to go get real jobs, you know, like drawing comic books and then licensing the movie rights. Miller, who unlike those thieving clown-baby rapists who currently occupy Wall Street, was in New York during 9/11. He, along with Glenn Beck and a few AM Radio hosts, was one of the few people actually affected by it while the rest of us were too busy living comfy lives in our parent's basements playing Lords of Warcraft* on our iPhones.

You see what we don't understand is that the real threat to our culture isn't the ever-widening gap between rich and poor (or Baron and Serf) it's Muslim people and their army of Orcs led by a nine-foot hermaphrodite who want to take away our freedom. Did I mention that he fixed Batman?
In this scene from 300, the evil King Xerxes threatens to have gay sex with the American flag.
Historical accuracy is extremely important to Miller.
*Yeah, I don't know what Lords of Warcraft is, but it must be a videogame so awesome that it distracts us all from the un-relenting terror we should all be living in.

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