Today in a middle-finger to the housing crisis:

A quarter of a billion dollars. A quarter of a billion. Let that sink in...huh? What's that? You can't? Yeah, me neither, but then neither you nor I are likely to be in the market for an apartment that costs that much either. Or, I don't know, maybe you are. And if that's the case, wanna hang out? Yeah, what am I on about? Oh, right, this:

Sorry, I should be more specific. I'm talking about the
soulless, gleaming spire of excess on the right there.

Is guillotine-ably wealthy already a
 phrase or did I just coin it?

And to answer your first question, yes, thanks to You Tube, I suddenly have opinions about the architectural landscape of a city I don't live in. Don't worry about it. Anyway, that blight on the New York City skyline is Central Part Tower, and is among the tallest residential buildings in the world. It's part of the city's billionaire row. A clump of super tall, super skinny, super expensive residential skyscrapers that cater to the toxically wealthy. Like, the kind of people who, in any other time and place in history, would have been carried off by an angry mob.

And possibly, on some of the
higher floors, stunning views
of the Irish coast.

To be clear, I'm not pro-angry mob, but I just feel like there shouldn't be such a thing as billionaires much less so many billionaires as to warrant an entire row. Although weirdly, nobody asked me. but where was I? Oh, right, Central Park Tower and it's penthouse that costs two hundred and fifty million dollars. That's a quarter of a billion. With a "B". The other apartments in the--huh? No, not bollars, the "B" is in billion. As I was saying, is a quarter billion is too much for you, there are other spaces available ranging from six and a half to sixty-three million. With an "M." Which is still way too much money. Yes, these apartments have square footage in the thousands, access to rooftop gardens, stunning views of Central Park, and Manhattan, and, one presumes, an inflated sense of self worth that comes with having your ears pop on the elevator ride up. But at what cost? What's that? Exorbitant cost? Well, obviously. I mean metaphorically.

I take a shameful amount of pleasure
in knowing that that all-white furniture is
going to show stains like nobody's business.

When I say they're too much money, I don't mean too much money for a fancy apartment, I mean too much money period. No one should be allowed to have that much, right? Like, is it crazy to have some limits on the amount of wealth individuals can control? Not to get all Elizabeth Warren on you here, but the government prints money so we don't have to barter, not so some asshat can sit atop a one hundred floor middle finger hocking loogies down upon the plebs walking their dogs in Central Park. 

The average home price in the US is $350,000. I did the math and a quarter billion dollars would buy like seven hundred houses. Which brings us back to the angry mob, and again, I'm not saying we storm billionaire's row. I mean, that's not actually much of a plan as rich people usually keep their money in banks and stocks and not in a vault where they can swim in it. But maybe, I don't know, can't we tax them or something? 

I'd almost respect the ultra-rich if they swam around
in their money instead of just hoarding it.