Tuesday, July 7, 2020

Turns out not everything is legal in New Jersey

Can you sue a state's governor for being cautious? I ask because AMC, Cinemark, and Regal which are movie theatre chains that have-huh? Oh, it's a big room where people gather to watch a movie they can't pause together.
They used to have them in the before time.
"Those chumps sure are falling for it..."
-Democrats, according
 to Republicans
Where was I? Oh, right, so the movie theatre chains are upset, riled you might say, because Governor Phillip Murphy of New Jersey isn't allowing movie theaters to reopen, you know, because of the pandemic? Which, smart move, right? Lots of people crowded into an enclosed space for long periods of time. I mean, if this whole COVID-19 thing wasn't just an elaborate hoax to make the President look bad, force everybody to accept universal health insurance and destroy America, I'd say that's a smart move. 

Arcades: evidently still a thing.
The major chains, as well as some smaller ones, contend that they are being unfairly left out of stage two of the Governor's reopening plan which allows a number of outdoor activities and businesses to resume along with some indoor things like museums and even mall retail stores, but specifies that movie theatre and arcades must remain closed until stage three. Keeping them closed, they argue, not only poses a huge financial challenge but also violates their First Amendment rights. According to their complaint:

I guess you could stream it.
Like, if you hate yourself.
"...the government-mandated total closure of movie theaters is neither fair nor reasonable, and is instead a violation of Plaintiff's First Amendment rights of freedom of speech and freedom of expression...and is a Taking of property without just compensation."

-Movie theatre chains arguing that
preventing them from showing the 
Trolls movie is basically fascism 

Look closely and you'll see the guy in the
middle not wearing a mask making everyone
else's mask useless. Because freedom.
So leaving aside the fact that streaming video renders movie theaters even less essential then they were before the pandemic, and forgetting for a moment that stuffing three hundred people in a room together is exactly how you kill grandma, they kind of, almost have a point. Personal care business like hair stylists and barber shops are reopening, and these put people in closer contact than movie theaters. Even casinos will be allowed to open this month and those are universally swimming with disease, so yeah, maybe New Jersey is picking on movie chains.

On the other hand, even if they win and movie theaters re-open, the fact that it wasn't fair for the Governor to keep them closed doesn't make them safe. If anything, the movie chains should be suing to get Murphy to close the barber shops and museums. I don't know, an expression leaps to mind here and I think it goes something like: pick your hill to die on, slowly of asphyxiation because you reopened your movie theatre too soon. 
"Hey, let's all breath on one another for two hours!"
-The kind of people that are going to 
go to movie theaters when they reopen

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