|Above: something that will in no way remind you of 9/11.|
Shit, did I just remind you of 9/11 by saying that?
|What exactly made them think 9/11 was |
ripe for parody? Was cancer busy?
|A similar disorder afflicts everyone|
involved in the Human Centipede movies.
Anyway, the owner of the store, Mike Bonanno, posted an apology yesterday because holy shit, how could he not? I mean, his staff actually managed to disgust the entire internet. And anyone even passingly familiar with the internet knows that's not easy to do.
|People reacting to the horrible shit on the internet is its |
own genre of video. That's how hard it is to disgust us now.
|I'm not a theologian or anything, but|
I'm not sure selling mattresses at deep,
deep discounts qualifies as a miracle.
"We are not hate, we are love. We are somebody that stands out. We're Miracle Mattress, we make miracles happen...It was a stupid idea that we sent out. And we apologize for our stupidity and we really hope you can forgive us for what we've done."
-Cherise Bonanno, Miracle Mattress's manager
offering her since adverpologies for the commercial
The ads caused an immediate-huh? Yeah, Mike Bonanno, Cherise Bonanno, I'm thinking they're related to. So that must be uncomfortable. Anyway, despite Cherise's plea for forgiveness, there's really no way anyone is going to forget that time she made a funny, funny mattress commercial about that time like 3,000 were horribly murdered on live television, so Mike announced today that Miracle Mattress will be closing immediately which yeah, feels about right.
|Bonanno went on to say that the store would be razed and then the |
earth where it stood would be salted so that nothing will grow there again.