Wednesday, April 5, 2017

The important thing is that they started it...

Just so we're all on the same page, this whole nuclear option thing really is the GOP's fault. Everyone gets that right? The Republicans totally started this whole stand off over filling Scalia's seat. Specifically this Republican:
Mitch McConnell, Senate Majority leader and noted human-turtle hybrid.*
Above: President Obama exercising his
typical executive overreach by nominating
a Supreme Court Justice. What a jerk...
So if you've been, I don't know, avoiding the news lately in the hopes of preserving whatever sanity you might have left, I'll sum up: Way back in February of 2016 Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia died which meant President Obama got to nominate a replacement, which he did. A judge called Merrick Garland. But then Mitch McConnell (seen above trying to retreat into his shell), citing a precedent that he just goddamn made up, decided that the Senate wouldn't even hold a hearing on Merrick. His ridiculous argument being that the next President should get to fill the seat, you know, so the people can have a say?

Which we, you know, did when we elected Obama. Twice. With a majority of the popular vote. Something Donald Trump in no way had. Unless of course you don't count all the illegal voters he tells himself cheated him out of a popular victory so he can sleep at night.
Pictured: the haunted face of a man who totally believes he belongs in that chair.
Yup, not the slightest doubt that maybe he's a fraud and we all know it...
I don''t know, look, I'm not a
theologian so let's say Gamera? 
Anyway, McConnell vowed unto his mighty turtle god that Obama would never exercise his constitutional power to nominate a new Supreme Court nominee and now, one year and one long, seemingly endless ordeal of an election later, Donald Trump's nominee, Neil Gorsuch is awaiting a vote and Democrats have promised to do everything they can to block him even going so far as to filibuster. Not out of revenge mind you, although who would blame them? Nope, but because the President is currently under investigation by the House, the Senate and the FBI for, you know, colluding with Russian intelligence.

Yeah. That's pretty much it.
So anyway, back to the nuclear thing. The Republicans have the option to either wait until the investigation is over and maybe be sure that the former head of the KGB didn't get to fill the seat on our Supreme Court by proxy which, I mean holy shit, how are they ok with that? Don't they like, worship Ronald Reagan and pine for the days when the U.S. and the U.S.S.R. teetered on the brink of mutually assured destruction? Do they hate Hillary Clinton that much?

Or and this seems like the more likely scenario, they can change the rules forever so that they just need a simple majority to confirm Gorsuch. A short-sighted move with lasting reprecussions that just might (absolutely will) bite them in the ass someday. Could they possibly be this blindly vindictive? 
"Dah. How you"
-The ex-KGB guy that basically 
picked our President for us

"Meep meep meep."
-Beaker, not reminding me
of Mitch McConnell at all
*Yes, a turtle. A low blow, I know, picking on a person's physical appearance. But you know what's also kind of shitty? Using delaying tactics to screw President Obama out of a Supreme Court nominee and then insulting everyone's intelligence by insisting that you're just looking out for the people. That was pretty weak, so turtle. Turtle, turtle, turtle turtle. Huh? Yeah, he does kind of look like Beaker from the Muppets too, but I wouldn't want to draw the comparison. I have far to much respect for the art of Muppetry. 

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