Ankle deep in regret and chlorine

Pictured: noted rich doofus, Mark
Zuckerberg seen here bemoaning
the lack of masculine energy.

Just to say that while I detest the direction Facebook and other social media companies have taken--that is, cowardly capitulation to the guy who's won two presidential races and yet still never cracked Hillary Clinton's popular vote numbers--I'm still on it. Facebook that is. For now. I just...I don't want to fall out of contact with certain people but can't, for whatever reason, ask them to follow me on some other platform. Is that weird? Yes, it's weird. And I accept that. I own that.

But it's just so hard to leave it. I mean, it knows me so well. It even offered me the opportunity to buy an Outdoors Time Inflatable Pool Bar, despite never expressing an interest in an inflatable pool bar, owning a pool, or drinking in general. But somehow this vaunted algorithmically-based targeted advertising thought that I was 100% the kind of person that would want such a thing in my backyard. Which I don't have behind the house I don't own. 

Finally, a place to drink while being wet.

Above: photographic evidence that truth
doesn't exist, nothing means anything
and all is meaningless.

Now if you're thinking what I'm thinking, that is, that this isn't so much a bar in a pool as it is a bar in an ankle-deep puddle of water surrounded by inflatable nonsense almost certainly made of a plastic that will never decompose and will definitely be choking a river or joining the great pacific Garbage patch someday, you would be correct. If this qualifies as a pool than anything qualifies as a pool. Truth doesn't exist, nothing means anything and all is meaningless. I guess what I'm saying is that kiddie pools aside--which this is defiantly not--there's a minimum depth required to qualify as pool. 

Some even come with LED lighting.
It'll be just like drinking in a limo!

But that's evidently not stopping inspiring InspiredDesigns.net from offering an entire range of inflatable pools in which the most mediocre among us can sip cocktails in the luxury of standing water. Yes, nothing will lower the value of your home like one of these. And it's not just for poors who can't afford a real pool, but riches too as some models can even float in your in-ground. At least that's according to the AI images on their site which is definitely not a scam.

While I'm usually leery algorithms and commerce (e or otherwise) in general, every once in a while something like this ad comes along and reminds me that the technology isn't quite there yet. Of course, maybe it is and this isn't targeted advertising but rather bait. Like, they're just waiting to see who is the kind of person to click on something like this...which I did to write this post...damnit. Chalk one up for the algorithm I guess.

Above: the kind of people who would click on something
like this, seen here saying things like "brah." and "woooooo!"