Sunday, December 23, 2018

The Metaphorical Fudd

It's sort of like a Kabuki of
blogger/reader futility.
I'm not a Twitter person. Like, I set up an account once, but I've never actually sent a tweet and I don't think the app is even installed on my phone anymore. But this might be the thing that gets me to use it...did you click on the link? No? That's fine, I'll just explain it anyway. It's been eight years of me linking to articles and eight years of no one clicking on them, and then eight years of me explaining what they're about. It's a little dance we do and besides, like fourteen point font on a middle school english paper, it pads out my blog posts.

Apologies to actual TV clowns.
So according to this, the cool new hashtag everyone's hashtagging is #TrumpResign. It's come in response to this nonsense about the TV clown who, despite losing the popular vote and then being personally responsible for the GOP getting its collective ass handed to it in the midterms, is petulantly folding his arms and stomping his foot and insisting that either he gets his five billion dollars for his racist border wall or else government employees won't get paid.

Because leverage I guess? I mean, I know those of us on the left just love crime and hate America, but shouldn't one be in a position of power before making demands? Sure, there's no reasoning with the unreasonable, but holy shit:
Citation needed. Like, for everything he says.
Well, since he seems to spend half his time
holding rallies for himself in stadiums full of
supporters, maybe he can be that deluded?
The greatest election of all time? Should we be worried that he believes his own press? Also, convincing a minority of Americans who happen to live in electorally valuable parts of the country that you're going to create more coal mining jobs and throw your political rivals in jail isn't the same thing as winning an election. It's more like he was foisted upon us by Facebook, Russia and a broken voting system. He can't possibly be so deluded as to think that his inability to accomplish his agenda is due to anything other than his unpopularity and incompetence, can he?

Of course, people who are bad
at their jobs don't get cookies.
Oh, and then, and then, he went on to brag about how he's giving up his vacation to deal with the shutdown that he caused:

"I will not be going to Florida because of the Shutdown - Staying in the White House! #MAGA"

-The President, apparently 
angling for a cookie.

Did you hear that Democrats? The President won't be going on his sixteen day vacation because of the shutdown. I hope you're happy. But back to the hashtag thing. So yeah, I love the idea that the President's precious social media space is full of calls for him to resign, but I don't think it's going to work. 
Because again, this horseshit.
"Wait, what? I mean, what?"
-The Press 
He has something of a track record for active aggression towards public opinion. We say he's the cause of the shutdown, he says Democrats are the cause of the shutdown because they won't give him what he wants. We say that climate change poses a clear and inarguable threat to the future of life on Earth and that we have to act now to avoid further catastrophe. He says "No. No. I have a strong opinion: I want a great climate, we're going to have that." The point is #ResignTrump is the right idea, but the wrong approach.

We have to use reverse psychology: instead of hashtags about how he should resign, we should fuck with him by making all our hashtags positive. Like, we still tweet at him about what a terrible job he's doing, but then we end with #DoingSuper! or #NotaColossalFailureasaHuman. Even if it doesn't work, we'll have the satisfaction of pushing him to ever increasing, vein-throbbing heights of frustration.
I call it the Duck Season/Rabbit Season approach,
and Trump of course would be the metaphorical Fudd.

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