Monday, June 23, 2014

Let's incite a rebellion!

Look at those assholes, getting along,
celebrating their differences. Makes me sick.
"I am tired of the left. They say they're for tolerance, they say they respect diversity. The reality is this: They respect everybody unless you happen to disagree with them."

-Bobby Jindal, fed up with us
liberal-commie queermo's and our
hypocritical intolerance for his intolerance

That was Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal harping on the left at last weekend's Faith and Freedom Coalition conference.

Yeah, the Faith and Freedom Coalition annual conference. I'm sure it was a blast...
It's like Fanime, except everyone dresses as the flag and hates Obamacare.
Think the Battle of Minas Tirith,
except with like, really judgy orcs.
Anyway, Bobby went on to make a veiled threat against the government about how our nation's capital is soon to be overrun by angry Christians who aren't going to take it anymore.

"I can sense right now a rebellion brewing amongst these United States, where people are ready for a hostile takeover of Washington, D.C., to preserve the American Dream for our children and grandchildren."

-Bobby Jindal, shortly before
Homeland Security showed up*

"I don't know, sanctimonious dickweed
has gotten me pretty far. I think I'm going
to ride it out, see where it takes me."
You know, predicting a Jesus-based "rebellion brewing amongst these United States" isn't exactly the same thing as inciting an insurrection, but what is it with conservatives and guns? For a group that can't stop talking about how patriotic they are, and how much they love America, they sure love to talk about overthrowing it. I mean, don't we have elections so we don't have to have rebellions? It's not the left's fault nobody votes Republican. Like, have they even tried making a persuasive argument? Or thought about not being such sanctimonious dickweeds all the time?

Oh, and does that bit about "preserving the American Dream for our children and grandchildren" seem a little weird to anybody else? Like, aren't these the same people who insist that the Earth is only 6000 years old and that they're going to be raptured any minute now? Couldn't they just run out the clock and leave the rest of us alone?
-The rest of us

*I'm joking of course. It's only considered terrorist chatter when non-Christians say it.

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