Lacking in Conventional Wisdom

Ted Cruz took the opportunity
to propose a new GOP salute.

Hey, get this, today at the Texas GOP convention, the party will vote on whether or not to, as a group, pretend that gayness is a thing that people can be talked out of through therapy:

"We recognize the legitimacy and efficacy of counseling, which offers reparative therapy and treatment for those patients seeking healing and wholeness from their homosexual lifestyle."

-Proposed addition to the Texas GOP

platform, and the reason nobody likes them

Gay people would join dinosaurs, climate change and the human capacity for decent behavior towards one another on the list of things the GOP doesn't believe exist despite incontrovertible proof to the contrary.

"People? Getting along despite differences? Might as well show me a heard of unicorns!
Which is impossible because there aren't any because they fell off Noah's Ark and drowned. Fact."

-Every Republican in Texas

Unfortunately, there's no cure for being
a sanctimonious dickweed either.

Today's proposal would make support for the debunked practice of trying to cure gay people of homosexuality, which the entire medical profession has written off as politically motivated red-state horseshit, a part of the party platform. According to the American Psychological Association the treatments are bogus and can seriously fuck people up, especially kids. It's already been banned in California and New Jersey, but then this is Texas we're talking about; a state where the official plan for drought relief is prayer.

They might as well be
voting on phrenology.

Check out the APA's Just the Facts About Sexual Orientation and Youth. It's a resource book which devotes fully a quarter of its text to discrediting precisely the kind of stupidity that Texas Republicans are trying to insert into their platform:

"The most important fact about these 'therapies' is that they are based on a view of homosexuality that has been rejected by all the major mental health professions."

-The American Psychological Association,
who, unlike everyone at today's GOP convention are
The American Psychological Association

Support for conversion therapy, if it passes today's vote, will be added to the Texas GOP's already heinously anti-gay platform which opposes gay people getting married, being treated equally and just plain existing. Here's the whole draft, read it and then thank Gay Jesus that you don't live in Texas.

"Whosoever believeth in Gay Jesus shall know everlasting fabulousness."

-The Bible*

Because seriously,
what is up with Texas?
For real.

"Homosexuality must not be presented as an acceptable alternative lifestyle, in public policy nor should family be redefined to include homosexual couples. We believe there should be no granting of special legal entitlements or creation of special status for homosexual behavior, regardless of state of origin. Additionally we oppose any criminal or civil penalties against whose who oppose homosexuality out of faith, conviction, or belief in traditional values. We recognize the legitimacy and efficacy of counseling, which offers reparative therapy and treatment for those patients seeking healing and wholeness from the their homosexual lifestyle. No Laws or executive orders shall be imposed to limit or restrict access to this type of therapy."

-Proposed Texas GOP stance on homosexuality,
you should probably go shower now

Maybe it's ok if you stick to the blue bits.

*Oh come on, like I'm the first person to make something up and then say it's in the Bible...