Today in reasons to move to New Zealand:

So a couple of rocket launchers and a grenade were found in someone's trash last week in Riverside, California, and the deeper one goes into this story the more one wants to move. Where? I don't know, New Zealand maybe? I hear it's nice and I don't think they have these kinds of problems in New Zealand.

Although I do gather that they have a problem with hobbits burrowing into
hillsides. While they may be quaint and charming, they are an invasive species.

If they practiced with, I don't know, mangos,
we wouldn't be having this conversation now.

Anyway, the weapons themselves aren't actually the upsetting part--I mean, they are--but the rocket launchers were just the empty tubes and not like, live ordnance. Although it does beg the question where are the explode-y parts of these things? And the grenade isn't a grenade per say, it's a practice grenade. Which I'd never heard of before, and I kind of feel like any small, oblong object of similar weight could be a practice grenade, but sure, this is an official practice grenade so fine. Whatever.

Wait, am I thinking of raccoons?
I might be thinking of raccoons.

Ok, all of this sounds like no big deal, right? Sure, this house is near a school, so obviously there's a concern that kids might get their hands on whatever this homeowner is throwing out--assuming of course that kids root through trash. Kids do that, right? I'm out of touch. Last I heard they were into dabbing and the TikTok. Doesn't matter, the point is school proximity or no, it's probably illegal to throw military equipment in the trash, right? Probably?

"Awlright lads, the moment they let their
guard down, we move it. Got it?"

Who can say? But what I can say, is that it's evidently not illegal to own rocket launchers and grenades, practice or otherwise. "What the what?" I hear you say. And yes, I had a similar reaction which brings us to the second most alarming thing about this story: apparently rocket launchers and grenades are--under the current interpretation of the part of the U.S. Constitution that says we can form musket-armed militias in case the Redcoats come back--technically legal with the proper registration.

"How else are we mediocre white
men supposed to feel powerful?"

-The entire pro-gun argument

Even if one lives near a school. Which, say what you will about American Conservatives, and I will, but you have to admit, they lean into their batshit hypocrisy, don't they? Like, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis just signed his "don't say gay or trans" law (which 100% says don't say gay or trans) into effect this last week on the bullshit premise that it's about protecting the children, but the Right, as a thing, also loves guns, and gun ownership. And will defend guns and gun ownership to the death. Specifically about forty-five thousand deaths. Per year.

Be kind to your local recyclables collectors
and please remember to sort your automatic
from your semi-automatic firearms.

Anyway, yeah, so even if you're not suppose to toss your rocket launcher tubes in the trash--check to see if they're recyclable I guess--it seems like not the kind of thing one should find in a residential neighborhood, right? Except get this:

"The Incident was not an unusual one, as we routinely find and seize inert military ordnance."

-The Riverside County Sheriff's Department

on why I now want to move to New Zealand 

Why? Why isn't this an unusual incident? This should be an unusual incident. But it's not. Why are randos playing with rocket launchers and practicing grenade throwing? There's no way you can convince me that this is what James Madison had in mind when he wrote the Second Amendment.

"There: a well-regulated militia. That should clear things up.
I mean, we don't want a bunch of gun nuts stockpiling weapons
or showing up to Starbucks armed to the teeth, now do we?"

-James Madison