Does she know it's already a thing?

Hey look, my home town has made the news for the first time since Alec Baldwin and his mother did some awkward local grocery store commercials! So yeah, you should probably sit back and get ready to feign interest as I recount to you some local politics from a place you've probably never been.

Baldwin, the star of 30 Rock and Threatening Tweets
is seen here sucking on his index finger in an ad for Wegmans.

Here she is on the cover of the
magazine she printed about herself.

Last week was Gay Pride week in Rochester N.Y, so buildings belonging to the City's Government marked the occasion by flying rainbow flags. It's a decoration, like taping those stupid paper Pilgrim hats to the bulletin board at Thanksgiving, or setting effigies on fire on Guy Fawkes Night (just 105 more shopping days to go!). The Monroe County Office building however, did not (not officially, but hang on, we'll get to that). How come? County Executive Maggie Brooks fills us in:

"It is not county practice to "'fly issue-based' or 'advocacy' flags' at the county building."

-County Executive Maggie Brooks

while making that stupid 'air quotes' gesture.

I'm confused, are gay people issues or advocacies? You know what? It doesn't matter, it's a goddamn rainbow flag during Pride week and it's what you do. And what the shit is 'county practice?' Is there a rulebook somewhere? Can I see it? Or does 'county practice' just mean whatever the hell she wants it to mean?

The County Practice Rulebook is apparently real and located in a locked filing cabinet
stuck in a disused lavatory with this sign (above) on the door (add +10 to your nerd roll).

In fairness, Brooks isn't the first to accuse
gay people of causing buildings to collapse.

Seeing an opportunity to make a statement about equality and to stick it to Brooks, County Legislature Democrats...huh? I didn't mention that Brooks is a Republican? Well, try to look surprised. So they got a rainbow flag and hung it outside Chief of Staff Joe Rittler's office. In response, some staff from the Sheriff's Office went into Rittler's office and confiscated the flag because, get this, they were concerned about the flag damaging the building. Because, what? A two-foot by three-foot nylon flag might bring down a five story granite office building?

Hey, way to avoid the bad press...

Anyway, Rittler then went out and got another flag, put it back up and dared them, just fucking dared them to go ahead and arrest him. Meanwhile I assume, he invited the local news to watch and take pictures of him being hauled away in handcuffs for supporting equal rights. Not wanting to attract the shitstorm of negative media attention, the Sheriff's office and Brooks backed off and she then declared July 19th 2013 to be Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley Day in Monroe County. You know, for all their inclusiveness and stuff.

To sum up: Maggie Brooks banned the rainbow flag from County buildings, made up some bullshit about how it was a safety concern and then asked the LGBT community to shut-up and enjoy Gay Day: a holiday set aside by Maggie Brooks to recognize that Maggie Brooks totally doesn't hate gay people. Um, someone told her it was already Pride week, right?

Thanks to Maggie Brooks, cities around the country are now celebrating
Gay Alliance of the Genessee Valley Day. Surprisingly enough, festivities
in San Francisco began three weeks before Brooks even declared the observance.