Hey, it's Eugene Cernan's Birthday!

He's about to give it
the Right Stuff

Thanks Wikipedia for your tireless devotion to obscure milestones! In case you're asking yourself who the hell is Eugene Cernan, I'll tell you. He was the last man to walk on the moon and today's featured picture on Wikipedia. On the one hand that's an awesome distinction (the moon thing, less so about the Wikipedia), but on the other hand, if we someday return to the moon and find a mess (like empty pizza boxes and beer cans) it's all on him. So congratulations Eugene, and Happy Birthday! Also, holy shit NASA, that was 1972. Why haven't we gone back? Did you find aliens or Decepticons or something? C'mon, you can tell me. Anyway, here's a picture of Eugene Cernan humping the moon (see right).

Just 208 more shopping days until
Leif Ericson day!

In the interest of full disclosure, I should probably tell you that the only reason I'm mentioning Eugene Cernan's birthday is because of his hilarious NASA photo. To be honest, I hadn't even heard of him before (thanks public school!) today. Yes, if you've read my blog before you may have noticed that I have a soft spot for unusual, defunct or outright fictional observances as well as a penchant for complaining about how NASA doesn't do awesome stuff anymore and this would seem to be a tasty combination of both themes. But alas, not this time. This was all about the picture.

Oh...uhhh...oh my, no.

I think most of us picture the people who work for the space program as a bunch of humorless mathematicians and science nerds. But for real, look at that picture (the one at the beginning of the post, not to the right. At all costs do not look at the one to the right). He's clearly having his way with the Earth's only natural satellite. Someone high up in the NASA press office must have looked at this and said: "Yes, perfect. That is the picture we are going to go with. Print it." And kudos to Eugene for standing there with a straight face.

Speaking of hot man-on-solar system action, did you know that the term 'venereal disease' is an old-timey way of referring to STD's? Venereal means 'of Venus.' Here's a little known fact: VD was actually brought back to the Earth by Soviet Cosmonauts on a secret manned mission to Venus, and that's why it burns when you pee.*

Hey kids, don't have sex. Ever.
A Public Service Announcement from Weyland Yutani.

*some of this is not true.