Today in shutting up about Leviticus:

Embarrassing for them, for us it was
this (see above) mixed with the sinking
realization that this is the new normal

I'm sure I don't even need to say it, but the Republican Party of 2023 is a rabid-foam, morally bankrupt, thug-driven shell of its former Party of Lincoln self. I don't need to say it, but I'm going to, you know, keep saying it anyway because seriously? I know that there was no scenario during the long, embarrassing goat-rodeo that was the fight over the House Speaker job in which a few of them were going to put politics aside and say vote for Hakeem Jeffries just have a functional government.

But still, watching half of America's political landscape trying to out do each other over which one is the most Jesus-y, the least woke, and hates trans people the hardest left me with the impression that there's no way forward with these people. Like, how do you have a good faith argument with someone who's only retort is "read your Bible?" 

"I just don't get it, I said the election was rigged, I threatened
my colleagues' families...what more do they want from me?"

-rejected Speaker candidate Jim Jordan

"Everything's an abomination with you..."

-the guy writing the Bible 

Which is what newly and grudgingly settled upon Speaker Mike Johnson told Sean Hannity when asked about his views. And I have some questions: which version of the Bible? What translation? Old Testament? New Testament? The part about abortion? Because spoiler alert, that's not in there. How about gay stuff? Because Jesus never says anything about it. The Old Testament does, but the Old Testament says a lot of things. A lot of things and since Mike appears to be wearing two different kinds of cloth at the same time, he can shut right up about Leviticus.

Pictured: Southern Baptist:
the cool ranch of Christianity.

(source: observation)

And look, the problem isn't elected officials having religious beliefs. Presidents Obama and Biden were vocal about their Protestant and Catholic beliefs respectively. Trump was vocal about being a goon. The point is we're not electing pastors or bishops or whatever, and read your Bible isn't an answer. Being Christian isn't a stance because it means something different to everybody. Most Americans identify as some flavor of Christian, sure, but most Americans also support gun control, abortion rights, and same-sex marriage so...what's up?

"The Constitution, like the Bible,
says whatever I want it to say."

-Johnson, evidently

"Read your Bible" is a dodge and we have to stop letting people use their deeply held beliefs and faith as an excuse for their shitty behavior. And by we, I suppose I mean actual journalists and not whatever Sean Hannity is. Like, none of these people are running for Pope or whatever, they're running for public office. And they all seem to forget the separation of church and state imperative of the First Amendment, whilst simultaneously squinting some sort of right to an unlimited personal arsenal out of the Second Amendment. 

And look, I'm no theologian and would probably describe myself as some sort of secular agnostic Vulcantologist, but I went to Sunday school as a kid, and this kind of Right-wing shit-heelery dressed up as performative religion doesn't bear much of a resemblance to anything they tried to teach us.

"Ted, I'd like you to meet Republican Jesus. We were just talking
about all the different kinds of people we hate. The poors, queermos,
women. You should hear the things that come out of this guys mouth!"

-Republican