Thursday, July 15, 2021

Glock block!

What? I'm not suggesting forced
reloca-oh shit...right fine, forget it...
No, I'm not being clever, that's what Utah-based gun manufacturer Culper Precision is calling their new and then immediately discontinued Glock, the Block19. And it's just further evidence that gun people--fine, not all gun people--are different from the rest of us. Well I say not all gun people, but obviously enough of them that America's gun-related fatalities outstrip other those of other wealthy countries by an order of magnitude. But not so much that we shouldn't seriously consider moving gun enthusiasts to one place, say, I don't know, Wyoming? And then just having one nutty red-state where they can all libertarianism themselves to their heart's content. 

Oh...hey, sorry about that...
Because for real, how are we even from the same planet as people who think coving a deadly weapon in Lego is a-didn't I? Well, it is. A deadly weapon covered in Lego I mean. The whimsically, and yet menacingly named Block19 is a Glock covered in off-brand--but fully compatible with Lego--blocks. But is it real? Probably not. One story about it says it was a real thing that was sold, another says it was a kit, but Culper Precision's Instagram post about it kind of makes me think it's a troll. 

Get it? Because stepping on Legos hurts almost
as much as bleeding out from a gunshot wound.
Here's what they said:

"We wanted the second amendment (sic) to simply be too painful to tread on, so there was only one logical solution. Here's one of those childhood dreams coming to life, the Block 19 prototype, yes you can actually build Legos onto it."

-A company whose products are 
used to kill people on a daily basis

Pictured: that time Change the Ref tricked
ex-NRA president David Keene into giving a
commencement speech to 3,044 empty seats,
each one representing a teen killed with a gun.
I don't find a Snopes about this yet, but I'm going with Culper Precision thinking that this was a funny, funny joke about how people who advocate for sensible firearms legislation are too uptight. You know, like, how people just can't see the humor in a toy that makes light of the epidemic of gun-violence that kills thousands, like, thousands with a "T" of kids each year. And it is for this reason that the good people at Culper Precision can go fuck themselves. Like, if this was some tone-deaf, but real product they were going to sell, it would almost be more forgivable than joking about dead kids.

Fun? Perhaps, but consider her safe at
your own peril. If you encounter the Queen,
try to make yourself look as big as possible.
Lego, obviously, demanded that Culper Precision take the Block19 off of their site, and they did, but then they posted a half-hearted call for responsible gun ownership followed by this:

"It seems that no matter what we create in the firearms industry anti gunners seem to leverage every *true* innovation (block19 is NOT an innovation it is a fun safe queen) shortly after its release to talk about why guns are bad. We are sick of the past.."

-Culper Precision, saying, uh, words?

Which, I'm sorry, are they complaining that "anti gunners" took the bait that they put out there for them to take? Also, what is a "fun safe queen?" And also also, an ellipsis is three periods. And yeah, since they brought it up, guns are bad. Like, objectively, demonstrably bad. There have been 296 mass shootings so far this year, and according to the Violence Prevention Center, a firearm is 35 times more likely to be used in a murder than in self defense. So like I was saying, I hear Wyoming is lovely this time of year.
But sure, I guess they really got us with their funny Lego gun prank.

2 comments:

  1. So happy you explained what a fun safe queen...is. Isn't. Thanks for the graphic. It helped a lot.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think it's important to raise awareness of what we can do to protect ourselves against the Queen.

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