Nobody besmirches the Muppets on my watch. Nobody.

Bow-chika-bow-wow.

What. The. Hell. A terrible person or terrible people recently broke into the Sesame Street You Tube account and replaced its innocent Muppetry with porn. This is not funny. Sure it was only for a few minutes but seriously, who does this? Look, I don't have a problem with porn, but it just doesn't belong anywhere near Sesame Street. If this happened to Yo Gabba Gabba or Dora the Explorer, fine. I don't care. But not the Muppets. NOT the Muppets. Jim Henson is off-limits; sacrosanct. The line must be drawn here.

15 years on the force. You wouldn't
believe the shit he's seen.

Hacking websites is illegal (I assume), so the police probably have some kind of Special Muppet Task Force that's all over it, but what's going to happen to the hacker (or hackers) when they catch him (or her, or them)? Community service? A fine? For besmirching Muppets? Sesame Street deserves better. It's a sweet and innocent part of our childhood that's been edutaining us for like 40 years and right now it's sobbing under the covers because it doesn't understand what it saw on its own website (it's ok Sesame Street, they were just hugging).

Funding for this angry mob was provided
by the Corporation for Public Broadcasting
and by the financial support of viewers like you.

But who's going to make this right? The courts? Psscht. Their lawyer will have them out and back on the street (specifically this street) in 24 hours. You know what I say? Let's get an angry mob together, track this asshole (or assholes) down and deliver some felt-covered, vigilante justice. So who's in? I know what you're thinking: "How are we even going to find this guy?" You're right, it's not going to be easy, I mean, there must be hundreds of people on the Internet. But we have to try, after all, if we don't stand up for Muppets, who will?

Besides, the internet can't be all that big, can it?

Here's a map of the Internet. You start in the upper right where they keep the complaints about changes to Facebook, and I'll take Gmail, all the Gawker sites and the barren wasteland where MySpace used to be.
Now, let's find this sonofabitch.