No, really, wear your mask.

What I'm saying is wear your goddamn mask, ok? I mentioned it because I am, as I write this, making my way across country to-huh? Yeah, I know it's a terrible idea to travel right now, but you know, plans were already in place before all this-look, doesn't matter, my point is I've spent the last three and a half days driving from California to upstate New York and saw mask on like, I don't know, ten percent of the people I encountered.

2,774 miles, 41 hours, 11 states and like nine people wearing masks.

Pictured: what we do instead
of attaining degrees now.

I'm not a doctor, but I've done a lot of research. Research, that's what we call it when we scroll through Facebook and take every half-remembered article-title as scientific fact that we then defend to the death against anyone who questions it right? So I've done research, and my understanding is that wearing a mask is as much for, if not more for, protecting those around you than they are for protecting yourself. Again, Facebook research, but I think that's pretty spot on.

Above: selfish dumbs...who are
also bad at math. And analogies. 

So when I've been driving for hours and stop at a gas station to fill up and I'm the only person around wearing a mask, that sucks. I mean, they suck. Doing the bare minimum to slow the spread of an actual pandemic is not too much to ask and it's not infringing on anyone's freedom-looking at you Wisconsin. I mean what the actual. It's not a debate between societal good and personal liberty, it's a debate between people who understand that this is going to get way worse if we don't do what we need to do and selfish dumbs.

Yeah, selfish dumbs. And not to paint every maskless goon with the same brush, but I feel like there's a lot of overlap between them and the people who walk around with automatic weapons to protect themselves from all the other idiots carrying automatic weapons. Which is weird right? I mean, it's almost like it's not about self-defense or even constitutional rights so much as they're just jerks.

Even weirder when they besiege the Michigan State House and none of
 them are arrested for being terrorists. Which they are. Terrorists I mean.