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Good work. Now, stop please. |
Just so you know, we're about to get nerdy. I know, look who I'm talking to, but I'm saying this to give you a graceful out if you don't want to follow me down a rabbit hole of Trekkie-ness. I understand. You hate things that are awesome, and that's your choice. I'll respect your right to disagree with me, even if your subjective opinions are objectively incorrect. There is, as I'm sure you're aware, an accounting for taste. So, still with me? Congratulations. Anyway, get this:
Star Trek 4 has been cancelled. Try to look surprised.
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Without Star Trek, the internet would
just be about kittens and porn, right? |
Huh? No, not the one with the whales, the fourth movie in the J. J. Abrams reboot series which is set in the Kelvin timeline; an alternate reality from the-you know what? It doesn't matter. The important thing is that it looks like it and any further movies with that cast are off, and I think we should discuss. And by discuss I mean I'll go on for a bit about how I feel about this, and maybe you'll read. Or not. I can't actually see you, but it's not like the internet is going to run out of room, so why not fill it with one-sided discussions about Star Trek?
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Out-dumbed only by Jean-Luc off roading
on a pre-warp planet in Star Trek Nemesis. |
I may have given the impression that I hate the Abrams Trek movies, and I kind of do. As a Star Trek fan, I don't love comic-book worthy science, casual disregard for cannon or the dumb popcorn movie tone. On the other hand the cast is good, they're fun to watch and if we're being honest, they're the only Star Trek movies you can show your non-fan friends and have them still talk to you afterwards. Also, the last one,
Star Trek: Beyond, was pretty good. Well, except for the thing with
The Beastie Boys. Oh, and Kirk riding a motor cycle.
And the entire planet of tiny aliens and-I guess it was pretty dumb, but the least dumb of the three.
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"Picard had a fish in the ready
room, why not a show about that?"
-Sir Patrick Stewart, spitballing
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Oh well, with
Discovery and, at last count like, fifteen other Star Trek spin-off things in development at CBS, I guess we don't really need
another one. In fact, I kind of wish they'd
tap the brakes a little. The reason for the cancellation appears to be contract related.
Beyond didn't do so well financially so Paramount decided that the cast should take a pay cut. Which, I don't understand the movie business, but it seems like it's not the cast's fault the movie didn't do well. I thought it'd be the marketing or the aforementioned dumbness of the script, but what do I know?
Anyway negotiations have dragged on so long that the director, S.J. Clarkson, has bailed to go work on the Game of Thrones prequel and now Star Trek 4 is technically 'shelved.' Not cancelled, shelved. But between Beyond not making a ton of money and all the focus on Discovery and the Picard show, I think we can just assume that's it for now.
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To be clear: Clarkson jumped ship to go work on a G.R.R. Martin
project, because she felt it was more likely to actually happen. |
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