Remember that time I killed Betty White?

Cautiously optimistic? No. Not even a little. If the twenty-first century has taught us anything, it's that one should always prepare for anything and everything to go sideways at any moment. Like, at this point, nothing would surprise me.

Sure, why not?

"You're welcome."

-Pope Gregory XIII

Traditionally, as the planet's odometer rolls over, one usually looks back and evaluates one's life and sets new intentions--resolutions if you will--for the new year. Not for any particular reason, I mean, the calendar is an arbitrary construct cooked up by some sixteenth century Pope who didn't like that Easter wasn't consistently happening in the spring. There's nothing particular 2022-ish about the planet's rotation around the sun and you can evaluate your life over any period without adhering to some meaningless three hundred sixty-five day span. You know how I know it's meaningless? Because of something called the Sunshine Protection Act. 

Too close is whatever this guy from
Kentucky most of us can't stand says it is.

You know how twice a year most of us have to adjust to either losing or gaining an hour because of some weird holdover to eighteenth century agriculture even though increasing few of us are three-hundred year old famers? Well like an inconvenienced pope, the U.S. Senate passed a bill back in March that would abolish this nonsense. And they passed it unanimously, which is amazing because these people can't even agree on anything. Anything. Not even on how close to an election is too close to let a President seat a Supreme Court Justice.  

And I'm sure the few remaining farmers not
bought out by agri-conglomerations are just
as happy to keep Daylight Savings Time.

Ok, great. I mean, it's kind of pointless now that everything with a cell connection automatically adjusts to the correct time, but fine, better late than never, right? Well, I guess we'll never know. The House failed to vote on the bill and now we're still stuck with this dumb relic of a bygone era. But the point here is that how we perceive and interact with time was up for a vote, or would have been had the relevant bipartisan committee been able to reach consensus on...something. Doesn't matter, the point is the whole thing is just something we made up.

New Year's is already a pretty thin excuse to
drink, and some "In Memoriam" list isn't going
to make it feel any more earned, so go nuts.

Speaking of making things up, the other made up thing we tend to do at this completely meaningless point in an equally meaningless continuum is list--for reasons I'm still not sure I understand--people who have died in the last year. Really I think it's because people who write things on the internet are just looking for filler material so they can knock off early and drink. But I'm not going spend a lot of time on that this year. Not because I'm better than that--I'm not--and not because we just did the whole thing about Daylight Savings Time. 

But because last time I think I may have unwittingly cursed Betty White by going out of my way to point out how dead she wasn't only to have her die like an hour and a half later. Mine is a terrible power and while I'd like to think I'd use it for good, I just can't be sure.

Sorry, that one was on me.