Blatant Tolkienism!

Look, I know it's kind of an obvious opinion to hold, but for real, anyone whining about people of color in Middle-Earth can go--I don't know--not watch it?

"You're going to watch the Lord of the Rings TV show, or else."

-An Amazon spokesperson, evidently

"Must express outrage...it sustains me..."

My instinct there was to opt for harsher language. "Fuck off" for example. But it's just not worth it at this point. Anyone working themselves up into a rabid foam lather about Black elves or whatever and raving on the internet about it is doing so out of the performative rage that insecure white conservatives feel because a fascist gameshow host tells them to. The rabid foam was already there, collecting around their rage-twisted mouths ever since Trump first upward failed his way into the White House.

Above: British actor Sir Lenny Henry as
Hobbit-like Harfoot Sadoc Burrows, seen here
ruining Tolkien and white culture forever.

According to CNN, Brandon Morse, editor or bullshit right-wing site Red State was complaining about the new show back in February when the first Super Bowl ad released, so it's not like--huh? Oh, sorry, we're talking about the redundantly named "Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power." It's on Amazon and yes I'm watching it, but if it makes you feel any better, I'm using someone else's login, so in a sense I'm stealing from Jeff Bezos. Which is basically heroic. Now, where was I? Right, Brandon Morse's screed which, to be clear, he had already formulated without having seen the show. Which, ok, cool. 

Pictured: the Secret Woke Council
who meet once a year under a full moon to
subvert Brandon Morse's favorite brands.

His argument is that LOTR: TROP (yikes, but I guess that's the acronym), and really all the:

"...brands and franchises that our culture holds up in high regard are being repurposed in order to create pre-made delivery systems for their message. It's an attempt to normalize their politics by embedding them in things we love."

-Brandon Morse, butt-hurt over Hobbits

Above: Brandon's culture.

So, couple of things. First, what does he mean by "our culture?" Normally I'd assume American culture, but this is a right-wing thing so it kind of feels like code for white. Similarly, the they of "their message" and "their politics" can, I believe, be presumed to mean progressives like us whose sinister agenda includes things like not bullying trans kids, guaranteeing bodily autonomy to women, and sometimes yes, fantasy TV shows with Black elves. We're, as you can imagine, monsters. 

You know, it's almost like Brandon Morse is just uncomfortable with people who don't look like him. "It's an attempt to normalize their politics by embedding them in things we love." Ok, but why does he love Lord of the Rings? Is it because of Tolkien's super-white fantasy realm? Or is he into the deep--at time incomprehensible--world building and stories.

Pre-wikipedia, your best bet for lore was to try and
make it through The Silmarillion. It was...dense. 

Congratulations uncredited background actor!
You are no longer single handedly responsible for
all representation in the entire LOTR series. 

Look, when Peter Jackson failed to cast a single person of color in the first three film versions of Tolkien's novels it was an error in judgement. He attempted to correct this with the (kinda mediocre) Hobbit prequels, but it just felt half-hearted. I mean, would an Asian dwarf have really thrown the verisimilitude of this fantasy world out the window? But now in 2022 it would have been downright unforgivable for LOTR: TROP's producers to cast an all-white Middle-Earth. We're just not having it.

I think we can all agree that Legolas
headshoting an oliphant and then surfing
down the trunk is, objectively, dumb.

But the argument that the producers of the new show are betraying Tolkien's work by casting people of color in roles that readers have either interpreted as, or Tolkien expressly described as, white is just frustrating. Sure, Tolkien constantly equated "fair" and "blond" with goodness and blackness with evil. He was also born in 1892 and couldn't write female characters to save his life. And, he'd be spinning in his grave had he lived to see the movies. 

Peter Jackson's plan was to put the Haradin in
masks and hope no one asked too many questions.

Was Tolkien a racist? I don't know. He did list the Haradin or "Swarthy Men" alongside orcs and goblins as servants of Sauron. But I'm not sure I'm qualified to sum up Tolkien as a person. Neither is Morse, but I do know that some elements of his work are hard to view otherwise. But we don't not enjoy them. We ignore the shitty bits or chalk it up to Tolkien writing in a less enlightened time. The TV show is a product of this time and as such is made with an understanding of both the lore and of the world as it is now. I mean, sometimes you have to cast a female X-Wing pilot. 

Lando Calrissian: also a trailblazer in the
under-represented Cape Enthusiast Community. 

Lemme explain. Take the original Star Wars . It has--and I'm sure someone can correct me on this--not a single character who isn't white. The Empire Strikes Back gave us Lando, but that's a lot for one actor to carry, even if he is Billy Dee Williams. Now take the prequels, the sequels, and the one-offs that followed in the twenty-first century. They're far more reflective of the world as it is today than the originals. Does this betray George Lucas? Of course not, he just wasn't thinking in the same terms back then as we do now and that's not a bad thing, that's progress. 

But does it violate continuity to suddenly insert Black Imperial officers into Star Wars or Brown Hobbits into Middle-Earth? Eh? Maybe, but no more than it does to suddenly switch to CGI spaceships or to film against an LCD wall. Diverse casting is just another filmmaking technology that has improved over time. It's a richer, more detailed world and if that's upsetting to the kind of person who would hate-watch Rings of Power just to complain about it on the internet, I'm fully behind it. 

"I mean, a Black hobbit? How am I supposed to relate
to fictional characters in a fantasy world if they're not cis
hetero white men with carefully manicured beards?" 

-Brandon Morse, noted

victim of wokeness