Prime Day: still not a holiday.

You may recall that I've expressed frustration in the past with social media sites with advertising algorithms that misjudge my interests. Like that time Facebook tried to sell me socks with photos of my pet on them. Well, I came across this add recently and can only conclude that the algorithm has not improved in the interim. 

I'm dubious, but by all means, tell me the crazy thing Sophie. 

And here I've been going to work at
a job like some kind of chump...

It's from a business coach called Sophie Howard, and this specific scam involves--sorry, did I just--you know what? I'm going to stand by "scam." This particular scam she's trying to sell people on involves you paying her to coach you on how to make money by publishing ebooks on Kindle. "I'm not a writer!" She pretends you protest. Well, first of all, yes you can, anyone can. Look at me. Second of all, Sophie says that doesn't matter. "How might this be possible?" you might reasonably ask. 

Writing: traditionally the
worst part of writing. 

Well, luckily, Howard's website has the answer:

"You don't have to be a writer to have a Kindle publishing business. In fact, YOU DON'T HAVE TO WRITE A SINGLE THING! [caps hers] It's possible to generate income from ebooks you don't write yourself."

-Sophie Howard, explaining

a totally legitimate business

So, couple of things. For one, publishers don't traditionally write books themselves, right? Like, writers have agents and agents work with publishers and look, I'm not an expert, but like, that's how publishing works. It's how it's always worked. Simon and Schuster didn't write Stephen King's new book. Stephen King did. Probably before breakfast. 

Pictured: Stephen King, seen here rattling off a couple
novellas in the time it takes you to read this caption.

Above: Grist for the mill.

My point is Howard is correct, you don't have to be a writer to publish something. But you should probably be familiar with the publishing industry. And you know, books in general. I'm not taking her course, because again, scam, but I think I'm piecing together what her schtick is. I think she's explaining how to "publish" public domain material on Kindle. You know, crazy cheap nonsense ebooks that clog up ebook sites? Now you know how they get there.

And it all sounds, I don't know, ethically dubious? If something's in the public domain it, by definition, belongs to everyone and anyone can use it freely. Sure, that includes copy/pasting it into a PDF document or whatever, but that doesn't make you a publisher, it makes you a middleman or uh...what're those organisms that live off of other organisms? 

Isn't it about time you made Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility work for you?

A pyramid scheme? Now that's just
being unfair. It's more of a triangle.

Her site if full of testimonials from people who generate income by doing this and, I mean, I can't blame them. The death throes of capitalism are brutal. But there's just something gross about selling other people's work, you know? Sure, I gather some of these people are indeed writing and selling their own work as well, and good on them. But I'd really like to know how much they're paying Howard's coaches--she doesn't coach you herself--and how it compares to the money they're making off Amazon. 

But whatever, I was talking about the algorithm that dropped this into my feed and how it has once again failed to see me. You know, as a person. It may be insensitive of me to say this so close to Prime Day, but Amazon, with it's cancerous effect on the economy and ability to reduce artistic work to content, is a lot of what's wrong in the world today, and I'm not sure why the algorithm thought I'd be interested in Sophie Howard's weird plagiarism scam.

I have notes: first, if you're going to hold it over two days, it should be Prime Days.
Also, please stop using the word epic. Beowulf is an epic, this is free shipping and twenty
percent off the plastic that's eventually going to end up as part of the Pacific garbage patch.