No, I don't have better things to think about.

Speaking of strong opinions about video games, did you see the-huh? Yes I was. Yesterday. Like I was saying, did you see the new additions to the Switch online service?

"Hey look, Psycho Dream! Finally!"

-no one, in the world

Free if you pay for it, so, not.

Oh, you've been too busy trying not to catch COVID to know what even I'm talking about? Well, let me fill you in. The online service for Nintendo Switch has these apps that let you play a selection of classic...well, old (we'll get to that) games from the NES and SNES, and every couple of months new titles are added. It's sort of like the Wii's virtual console except you the games are free, assuming you subscribe to the online service, and you don't own them, and they're mostly terrible. 

Unless you smoke and live in New Jersey, then
you can get the shot now. Which, cool. I guess...

I know, I know, grown adult, why am I even on about something like this? And besides, it's free, so what am I complaining about? Well, to answer the questions I'm pretending you're asking, first of all, what else am I going to do while waiting to get vaccinated-which as a relatively healthy person under 65, should be, what, December? And besides I'm not complaining, not really, I'm just...questioning the rationale. Like, this month's update includes three titles which I don't think I've ever heard of. At all. And I'm a big huge nerd. 

Above: Prehistorik Man...I think? Or
Bongo's Caper? Wait, is this Super Bonk? 

I mentioned Psycho Dream, a side scrolling platform game that never came to the U.S. Then there's Doomsday Warrior which, according to the internet, is an obscure Street Fighter knock-off. And Prehistorik Man, one of like fifty cave-man themed SNES games that kids' parents in the 90's brought home when Blockbuster was out of Joe and Mac. Cave-man themed games were a huge thing back then for some reason. We called them Cavies (no we didn't). There's a fourth title, Fire 'n Ice, which sounds familiar, but I don't think I'm being unfair when I say it's not a classic. And again, this thing is free-ish and I'm not complaining, I just don't get it. 

Although admittedly $20 a year would
be pretty good for a horse, regardless
of the condition of its mouth.

There were are hundreds of NES and SNES games released between 1983 when the original Famicom (NES) came out in Japan, and 2000 when the Super Famicom (SNES) was officially discontinued, so why are Tuff E Nuff and Nightshade on the service, but Earthbound, Super Mario RPG, and Actraiser are all missing? And-huh? Ok, fine, technically I am complaining, and yes, it is a little like looking a gift horse--albeit one that costs $20 a year--in the mouth. But c'mon, Brawl Brothers is on there, but no Final Fight?  I guess I just don't understand why. I mean, was somebody, was anybody asking for another shot at playing Preshistorik Man?

Unless...hey, could it be that no one was asking for them at all and that the games that end up on the service are all from C and D list publishers looking to make a few bucks off some older titles they still own the rights to but aren't quite memorable enough to warrant a proper re-release. Say, you don't suppose that's it, do you?

Pictured: Bing Bing! Bingo, an obscure Super Famicom game from
equally obscure publisher KSS. Coming soon to Switch online (probably).