Suddenly everybody's Christopher Gadsden...

From the city that brought
you the Garbage Plate.

I just want to be clear that being asked to follow simple and reasonable precautions to slow the spread of a super-contagious airborne pathogen that has killed tens of thousands of Americans isn't the same things as say, having your freedom taken away. I mention this because idiots. Specifically the idiots involved in Re-Open Rochester, a grassroots organization for dumbs that feel that their rights are being brutally stolen by shelter in place orders. Oh, and did I mention they're from my hometown?

Because they are. Fortunately it's only like a dozen of them, but still, it's disappointing. Anyway, they gathered outside the swankiest grocery store in the area's richest suburb to demand that everyone get back to work. Which is weird. Not only because grocery stores are already open, but because we're in the middle of a goddamn pandemic.

Seriously. It's open right now. They'll even put groceries in your
car for you. Speaking of which, get back in your car. Go home. 

Pictured: the air six feet from
Susan Barrett's mouth.

(source: for all we know)

One protester, Susan Barrett, a nurse, an actual nurse, pulled down her mask and vented her complaints along with, I presume, a cloud of microscopic globules of spit containing potentially any number of viruses, directly at local reporter Kayla Green saying (and spraying):

"We're closing down our country for something that, yes, is really, really awful, but I think right now the cure is worse than the disease."

-Susan Bar-seriously? A nurse?

Not saying they're bad parents, just
dumb parents. I don't think that's unfair.

So couple of things. First, we're not closing down our country, that's been sort of the problem all along. And second, the disease is a slow death drowning in your own mucus so no, the stay at home order is objectively not worse than the disease. Also, if you watch the footage you'll see kids. These assholes brought their kids with them and one of their dumb demands is that schools should re-open as well. Huh? Yes, as noted earlier, in the middle of a goddamn pandemic.

And look, I know that this is plunging us into what may well be another Great Depression. And I know it sucks for them to have to be at home with their own kids. I mean, their kids are truly the worst. But this sucks for everybody. And it sucks more for people currently suffering through it for weeks on end, and it sucks way more for people who die of it.

Huh, maybe they should have been smarter with their vote?
What? Oh, like these protestors aren't at least 90% Trumpies.

Pictured: Deborah Wallace, one of the
social problems she's complaining about.

"Obviously people who are at risk should take precautions? ...you keep everybody locked up forever, you face a lot of social issues and so I think we need to look at the whole picture not just this one, tiny issue of people getting sick. Not that that's insignificant, but it's small when you look at all of society. We need to look at the big picture here."

-Deborah Wallace, local protester

opining on the survival of the fittest

Look, I don't know Wallace's political leanings, but again, rich part of town, demanding that we sacrifice the elderly and infirm for the good of the economy? I'm betting that she's all about the needs of the many when it comes to re-opening retail and restaurants or whatever, but would lose her mind if anyone suggests that we re-evaluate how much of America's wealth is in the hands of the few.

They're not insignificant, but the 1% is small when
you look at all of society, right Deborah? So, let's get'em.

"Save our Livelihoods." I mean,
is it so hard to plan ahead?

I guess what I find infuriating, aside from the protest signs with all the letters scrunched at the end because they ran out of room, is the use of Revolutionary Way imagery. I mean, shelter in place isn't the same thing as a progeria-addled King thousands of miles away levying unreasonable taxes. It's what you do so you, your kids, your parents, the server you're berating because your fries are cold, and everyone else you interact with on a daily basis doesn't die horribly.

Like, waving Gadsden's "Don't Tread On Me" and thirteen star flags is nonsense. Poppycock even. Really they're just selfishly and shortsightedly endangering the lives of others, including their own kids; who again are terrible, but they don't deserve any of this. So if you see these people out and about, I suggest you boo them. Booo! And maybe tell them to save the Sons of Liberty crap for the next time someone tries to make it harder to vote.

Well why don't you dump some tea in the harbor over it?