This is why she gets kicked out of restaurants:

"I mean, who do you people think you are?
 Coming in here and asking questions..."

-The Press Secretary

So Trump administration spokesperson Sarah Huckabee Sanders said today in a press conference that-huh? Yeah, they still have those from time to time, but they're less about answering the press's valid questions about how the President is conducting America's affairs and more about Sanders explaining to us how all the terrible and reckless things the President does and says are actually awesome and how dare we question him? Anyway, Huckabee Sanders said that the White House was 'looking into' removing security clearance from six former officials.

They're not like, secutiry risks or anything, they just criticized the objectively terrible job he's done as president, and we're basically Russia now so...Anyway, according to Sanders:

Is 'because they were mean to me'
valid grounds to revoke clearance?

"Not only is the President looking to take away Brennan's security clearance, he's also looking into the clearances of Comey, Clapper, Hayden, Rice, and McCabe. The President is exploring the mechanisms to remove security clearance because they've politicized, and in some cases monetized their public service and security clearances..."

-Sarah Huckabee Sanders

without a hint of irony

Wait? Politicized? Monetized? Has-has Donald Trump in his inexplicable year and a half as the President done anything, anything at all that couldn't be characterized as either the politicization or monetization or both of his job? Like, how many campaign rallies has he had since taking office? I mean, has Sanders somehow not actually met her boss?

Hey, who left this picture of Trump holding
a summit at his Mar-A-Lago Resort here?

Hey, who left this picture of Trump
and Paul Manafort...oh never mind...

She went on to add that:

"Making baseless accusations of an improper relationship with Russia or being influenced by Russia against the President is extremely inappropriate. And the fact that people with these clearances are making these baseless charges provides inappropriate legitimacy." 

-Sarah Hucka-wait a minute...

Um...this?

Which, well yeah, I guess they would be if they were baseless but, and I reiterate, holy shit. Did we not watch an improper relationship unfold before our very eyes like last week in Helsinki? Remember when he took an ex-KGB agent's smirking assurances over the consensus of every intelligence agency in America? And also, isn't removing the security clearances in retaliation for criticism like, textbook politicization? Fortunately someone in the room asked Sanders just that, to which she responded:

"No, the President's not making baseless accusations of improper contact with a foreign government and accusing the President of the United States of treasonous activity when you have the highest level of security clearance. "

-Sanders on...wait, what?

"Nuh-uh, you are!"

-Me, summarizing Sander's response

Kirk has talked androids into self-
destruction with more coherence.

Yeah, what? But she's not done:

"When you're the person who holds the nation's deepest most sacred secrets at your hands and you go out and you make false accusations against the President of the United States he thinks that is a...uh...something to be very concerned with. And we're exploring what those options are and what that looks like."

-Sanders, to a room of blinking disbelief

Pictured: The person most
of us elected President. 

Of course the President isn't going to accuse the President of improper-he's the President. That's the point. What is she even saying? I mean, baseless is saying that three million illegal immigrants, whom you totally made up, voted for Hillary Clinton when they didn't. Suggesting that Donald Trump may have had something to do with the unprecedented election meddling that 100% put him in the powerful position he's politicizing and monetizing the shit out of, is, you know, reasonable.

"It's going to be bonkers."

-Susan Rice on her kegger

Anyway, look, I don't know how security clearances work. Maybe it's totally normal to rescind to rescind security clearances of former officials. I'm sure ex-FBI Director McCabe has been eying the silverware since day one. And you know the minute Trump is out of town, former National Security Advisor Susan Rice is throwing a totally kegger in the White House ball room. But I'm willing to bet that this is more about a thin-skinned amateur flailing around because he doesn't have a clue how to be President.

You know in some ways, the real victim here is Sarah Huckabee Sanders who has to go out there and spin this like it's just another savvy political move from the man who brought us threatening tweets and forced child separations. But before you feel too bad for her, remember that she can always quit. Like, she's a professional shit merchant by choice.

Oh don't look at me like that. I'm sure Fox News would give you a job.