Today in elevating the discourse...

Yes, our de-facto two-party system has a ton of problems and yes the primary election process is seriously weighted in favor of establishment candidates and our entire democratic system is rife with corruption and cronyism. Holy shit guys, we know. But seriously, a fart-in? A fart-in. Is this even for real? Because I'd very much like for this to be a joke or a hoax or something. Of course, I'd like a lot of things about this election to have been a joke.

Any time you wanna say 'just kidding' would be fine by me...

See what he did there? Stink?
Man, I bet he got his doctorate
in wit and sparkling word play.

According to this, Dr. Walter H. Tsou is getting a bunch of disgruntled Bernie Sanders fans to eat gassy foods before the Democratic Convention next week so they can fart in protest of Hillary Clinton being the nominee.

"It's a whimsical way of raising a protest. There's a lot of things that stink about this whole Democratic primary process."

-Dr. Walter H. Tsou, elevating the discourse

"Hey, that guy's ass has a good point,
whatta ya say call a roll call count!"

-The DNC. probably

So like, what's their point? Other than farts are hilarious? Do they think they're the only people that get that the system is kind of fucked up? Like, I'm not suggesting that Clinton didn't win fair and square. Both candidates were campaigning under the same rules and even if the the DNC changed the way we vote for our candidates, it sounds like Clinton would have won anyway. Do you suppose they're hoping this fart-in thing is going to change people's minds? Like they're going to flip the convention with flatus and whimsey? 

Ok, so a fart-in that's cool, whatever, but now would be a great time to come together as a party, you know? I just hope that after they have their stupid protest, Tsou and his fans are planning to like, vote for Clinton. Because no matter how valid Dr. Tsou's point about ridiculousness of the super-delegate system is, no amount of being able to say 'told ya so' is worth four years of President Goddamn Trump.

Or hey, here's a better idea: why don't they go fart-up the Republican Convention
and then, and I can't stress this enough, come back and vote for Clinton.