Let's get libelous!

Pictured: The thing I'm not saying
George R. R. Martin must be on.

I'm not saying that George R. R. Martin is on cocaine. I'm really not. I mean, how would I know? I don't know the guy, or anyone who lives with or works with him. I only know what he writes and what others write about him and he does, by his own admission, have a lot on his plate. Two books, three TV series and three short films and that's not counting signing books, appearances and going to see Jurassic World, which he didn't write or anything, he's just going to go see. You know, like a regular person.

Anyway, take all that stuff, add sleeping, eating, a reasonable number of bathroom breaks and my question is: no really, how much coke is George R. R. Martin on?

I asked this off-duty mall Santa, but he just told me to fuck off.

What? He is and there's not.

I'm not criticizing or judging or anything. Aaron Sorkin wrote the shit out of the first four seasons of The West Wing while subsisting on a diet of idealism and all the drugs ever made and that was just one TV show. Martin, as I mention above is working on three along with all that other stuff. So like, where does he find the time? I mean that. I can barely find find two hours every couple of days to hammer out a blog post and all I do is write about what a dick Mike Huckabee is or complain that there aren't enough Star Trek shows on TV.

Oh, and just to be clear, I'm only speculating as to how this guy can get so much done in a day, not complaining about how long he's taking with A Song of Ice and Fire: Book VI: Everyone Dies, Even Arya. I've given up on that and resigned myself to that series being a generational thing. You know, like colonizing space.

"Eight decades of cryo-sleep and the ice zombies still haven't
 made it to the goddamn wall? What the hell, Martin?"

-Disappointed space colonists,

orbiting Proxima Centauri