Pixel Clump Omega

Holy crap, there's a thing on Mars! A guy named David Martines was tooling around on Google Mars (holy crap, there's a Google Mars?) and spotted some kind of fuzzy thing on the surface. Here, check out this YouTube video. It comes with helpful commentary describing just what the hell we're looking at and why it's obviously not a naturally occurring object or say an anomalous clump of pixels.

Symmetry? Corners? My god, whoever they are they must be centuries ahead of us!

Guess what jackass,
that'll be there FOREVER.

Using my favorite kind of scientific reasoning (specious), Professor Martines (What? He might be, you don't know) determined it was a base constructed by either humans or aliens and named it Bio Station Alpha. Yeah, Bio Station Alpha. Why? Glad you asked: 'Bio' because it's clearly a habitat of some kind, 'Station' because it's not going anywhere and 'Alpha' because greek letters make anything cool. Well, almost anything (see left).

While I appreciate David Martines's and the YouTube's totally scientific conclusions, I did a little image analysis of my own using an algorithm I wrote in my spare time. What I found was truly startling: 

Syence!

Behold:
Our Imperial Overlords

That's right. As you can clearly see, what we're looking at is no Bio Station at all, but the wreckage of a crashed Klingon Battle Cruiser. And, by the looks of it there's a decent chance that the warp drive and disrupter banks are intact and just waiting to be reverse engineered by whomever has the spaceballs to go get it. To this end, I propose we launch an immediate salvage mission. We can call it "Operation: Dibbs" or "The War on Mars." After all, the last thing we need is for the Canadians to get their hands on a cloaking device or something.

Weirdly enough, this is the clearest
photo of Bigfoot ever taken.

Seriously though, wouldn't it be cool if this really turned out to be a thing? I mean, we've totally been burned before when it comes to mysterious objects spotted on Mars. First it was canals, then the face and most recently Bigfoot (no, really). Seeing things on the Martian surface is like Jesus sightings for science fans. Actually, crashed UFO or alien base is probably one of the saner things we've seen there.